Have you ever looked up to someone in your life so much that you wanted to be just like them? For me, my uncle was that person. He was like a father figure to me and was an AMAZING role model in my eyes. Even as an adult, I believe he really went out of his way to take care of my older sister and me. He’s a retired United States Marine, he played Rugby for college (when they had it in the U.S.), and he has worked as a Police Officer for YEARS! This man is a hero not only in my eyes, but in many others as well.
I wanted to be just like him. I wanted to serve my country, I wanted to protect people, and serve a community. But when I learned that people with hearing aids could not enlist into the military, one dream was shot down. When that dream was shot, I felt like my whole life plan was gone. So, I just did whatever came. I played soccer for twenty years total. Occasionally, I dreamed of playing pro. Obviously, that didn’t pan out either. For many years I had no real idea what I wanted to do. Well, the summer before my final year at NAU (seven years later), I learned of a new opportunity. I could still serve my country but instead of enlisting, I would work as an intelligence analyst for one of those secret three letter agencies. Essentially, I would work for the United States Government in the Intelligence Community.
From that summer on, I wanted to work for a secret agency. I mean, come on, how cool would that be! You’d be like the most mysterious person because you couldn’t actually talk about your work, you’d disappear for months at a time and couldn’t tell anyone where you were. “Yeah mom, don’t worry about me! I just took a trip to England with some friends, I’ll back soon.” When you’re actually in the jungles of Congo. Okay, that wouldn’t be me, especially with my hearing and vision impairment, but I would be working on assignments in support of stuff like that. At least I could be, who knows what i’d actually be doing. There are endless possibilities of the jobs I could do like that. I could even work for one of the military branches as a civilian employee or I could be in Washington D.C. working in a room next to the President!
But what changed?
That’s a hard question for me to answer. Technically, nothing has changed. I would still love for the opportunity to work with an agency and serve my country like I have wanted too all those years growing up. I would love to live it up in D.C. and have a good life doing something I truly believe in. But when I think about all of the other things I may not be able to do in my life, or should not do because of my job, I waver on the idea. I’m hesitant to miss out on being able to be a creator, another ongoing dream.
Let me clue you in on why, I think, I wouldn’t be able to PUBLICLY be a creator. Depending on the type of work that I would be working on, having my face or name on a public YouTube channel, book, or blog site, could potential be really bad… An agency may not want a person, associated to their office, to have their actions or views so open to the public. The agency may see it as a risk factor. Information sharing, whistle blowing, etc. It could also be a danger to myself as well. Again, this highly depends on what I’m actually working on. If it is learned that I am working on a certain project or for a specific department, someone could find me or my family, and use them to leverage top secret information out of me.
Hey, FBI or CIA guys reading this, if i’m wrong, correct me. I know you’re out there.
In all seriousness though, yes, I would still like to work for the government so that I can fulfill my dream of serving my country. However, if it means, I can’t be a creator through this blog, my books, my music, or my YouTube channel, then maybe the current route i’m on, is the best one for me.
As of right now, I’m working on my Master’s Degree. I expect it take me about 2 – 3 years, so I will see if being a creator is for me in the next 3 years and if it’s not, then maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea for me to pursue my other dream, it’s never too late to try, as long as it’s before I’m 35. As I always say about something I’m not so sure about, “only time will tell” and until next time, cheers!